Faulkner Paper Progress 6

I started with the actual Faulkner books I like Go Down, Moses and Light in August with my new thesis to defend. I'm not through with Light in August yet and I already have 3954 words. I haven't written an introduction, conclusion, or explained how the examples I culled from Faulkner can help the South reconcile its history, while aiming for 7500 total words. I think this is doable for the first draft, since I will probably have to add in secondary sources.

This leaves me with what to do with Flags in the Dust, the Sound and the Fury, Sanctuary, and Absalom, Absalom!. I already culled As I Lay Dying for not matching my thesis. So based on word count, I shouldn't worry about the rest of the books. The problem is I really don't want to bother with them because I don't like them. Everyone studies the Sound and the Fury and practically forgets the man wrote other books. The other three are filled with characters I have precious little empathy for, and I can see myself pulling my hair out trying to support my thesis with them because of the dislike. So I'm not stressing about them right now. First Draft will only cover Light in August and Go Down, Moses.

Do I expect my professor to tell me I have to add them back in? Pretty much. Absalom, Absalom! won't be that hard to shoe-horn in with the thesis and the biracial issues. Flags in the Dust obsession with the past doesn't use the sexual connotation the same way the later books do. And I'm not sure my reading of the incest angle in Sanctuary reflects on personal and societal history.

That's what September is for, I guess. :D

Resistance Monster meet my clenched gut

I let go of the Zen, got furious, and began typing. And while I haven't changed my opinion that first drafts should not be published, and will continue preaching that for the sake of the newbie writers who need to hear it, I am getting disgusted with having to explain to each individual resistance monster: "this is my opinion, take it or leave it. And my opinion does not make me mental, no matter how much you want to say I'm elitist and entitled and my position is impossible for the real world."

If they read whole thread, I think I explain my views much better further down. But no, they all want to chime in on the first message with a defiant foot stomp. "YOU ARE WRONG WRONG WRONG! Because I ALWAYS POST MY FIRST DRAFT AND YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" Make that a kicking tantrum. Not that they will call it that. Their resistance monsters have made them think they are protecting their freewheeling Live Journal experience from my evil dictatorship. Less than a dozen post and I'm already the wicked witch; that's gotta be a record! :D

And how the hell can you actually be a dictator on the Internet?

You learn by finishing. Even if you picked a bad book idea, in most cases you will learn more by seeing it through than you will by chasing after that Sexy Next Book idea. -- 146 Chapter After Chapter by Heather Sellers

It's hardly a complicated idea, but I'm tired of defending it. I thought I had made my passions and why clearer further down the thread, and it's all good. Someone new tells me I'm loco and should piss off demanding conclusions from people. I explained that I didn't demand anything from anyone and how much I try to spread my knowledge. To no avail, I'm supposed to be happy reading something incomplete because the reader doesn't matter. We aren't really publishing by posting for people to read it. I couldn't parse the logic of that and left it alone. Now back to the first post with a new person's sneer who made you English teacher for the whole world, you crazy bitch. And again, we don't owe the readers endings if the muse abandons us.

You don't owe the readers a beginning until you have an ending. But then we're back to the logic of the reader doesn't really exist online. I wish I could take a picture of my expression while trying to figure that out. If the readers don't matter, why do you bother inviting people to read it? Just keep it on your hard drive. Emily Dickerson locked her poetry in a trunk; the concept isn't new.

Not that I've bothered to check, but I have to wonder if they all have abandoned stories on their Live Journals. Nothing gives the Resistance Monster more strength than guilty twinges. The people I contacted asking for conclusions were less defensive. Of course, I wasn't pissed off when I contacted them.

My guts seize up every time I get a new resistance monster tantrum, and I'm tired of repeating myself. I do regret my earlier pissed-off tone, but I don't need my frustration of repeating myself on top of my Faulkner frustration. I'm ready to do what I have NEVER done in all my posts--delete the damn thing they're all getting fixated on. I have no idea if that is even possible. I don't even care if they all walk away smug. "HA, we were right and she slunk off." I can go back to one on one help to find the ones who want to put the extra care in. The ones who will go further. Hopefully, it can be done. And eventually I will convince my own resistance monster that I'm not bypassing a perfect teaching opportunity here.

Update: *Rolling eyes* NO WHERE did I say you shouldn't post whatever you bloody want to on your personal LiveJournal. I specifically said posting to a community and FF.net. That is inviting the fandom to read it. And yes, in my opinion, it should be finished before you do that.

I deleted all my comments. Unfortunately, it didn't give me the option to erase everything under them that I was hoping for. Screw it, I'm not your punching bag. Enjoy your gloating "yeah, we got rid of her!" while you can. Because I haven't gone anywhere.

Faulkner Paper Progress 5

• Aug. 4 = Email update to Dr. Louth
• Aug. 19 = First day of Fall 2009 semester
• Aug. 19 - 21 = Email Dr. Fredell for memo to the library to restore borrowing privileges.
• Aug. 27 = Pay all fees I can afford to
• Aug. 28 = if there is any money left from the paycheck, buy all the damn Cliff Notes I can find on Faulkner's works. I'm tired of reading passages and wondering what the hell just happened.
• Sept. 1 = email Dr. Louth copy of first draft, then schedule meeting
• Oct. 12 - 16 = Draft to turn in is probably due this week. Usually due around Oct. 15th
• Nov. 12 = should send out notices of graduation
• Dec. 7 = Deadline for Graduate Exams - if readers want changes a new draft due before now
• Dec. 12 = Commencement ceremony 10 am

So this is going to be a busy seven days, given how my first draft is nebulous at best.

Faulkner Paper Progress 4

I think I have had the breakthrough. Or else, my head hurts from banging it against the Faulkner writing block, and it has developed this as a delusion of a thesis paragraph.

Although Faulkner is usually considered just an author obsessed with race relations and the Civil War, his novels and interwoven short stories show the characters' sexual lives emphasizing their disillusionment, ambivalence, or acceptance of their personal pasts, which in turn reflect on how the South as a society makes peace with history.

That at least gives me a framework to relate all these characters with each other, even if I don't know how I'm going to pull the greater life lessons for society out of the works. :p Actually what popped out at me as I was trying to group couples in each book, Faulkner has a lot of triangles between characters. I don't know what I'm going to do with that inside the paper, but hopefully it didn't just make everything harder.

Tin Man: Pirates Notes 07

Because I need to put them somewhere I can find them again. Just in case I have a memory lapse.

Edit point 1: Raw used the beacon charm to get to DG at the castle which I can't spell

Edit point 2: Galinda was only queen for nine years before possessed!Az's coup. She was only Queen for four years when Az was possessed.

Faulkner Paper Deadlines

So I have ignored him all summer. Not the best plan for my deadlines, but very healthy for my state of mind. I still need to email my professor on the state of the project, so these dates are subject to change.

• Aug. 4 = Email update to Dr. Louth
• Aug. 13 = if there is any money left from the paycheck, buy all the damn Cliff Notes I can find on Faulkner's works. I'm tired of reading passages and wondering what the hell just happened.
• Aug. 19 = First day of Fall 2009 semester
• Aug. 19 - 21 = Email Dr. Fredell for memo to the library to restore borrowing privilages.
• Aug. 27 = Pay all fees I can afford to
• Aug. 31 - Sept. 4 = Schedule first fall meeting on paper this week: first draft should be done
• Oct. 12 - 16 = Draft to turn in is probably due this week. Usually due around Oct. 15th
• Nov. 12 = should send out notices of graduation
• Dec. 7 = Deadline for Graduate Exams - if readers want changes a new draft due before now
• Dec. 12 = Commencement ceremony 10 am

Not freaking out. Not freaking out. Not freaking out.

My clue on the subject hasn't gelled into a thesis argument yet.

Okay, maybe a little panic. And I lost the whole weekend in a last ditch effort to get Alt. BM Site up for Monday.

I will not scream over the cron job failure. I will not scream over the cron job failure. Hopefully, I will get a response and be able to fix that tonight.

I have a month to get it together: thesis statement, coherent content, primary source material woven into it. *TWITCH* Secondary sources will be the issue for the second draft. Don't be surprised if I suddenly brainstorm on this subject, or if suddenly new brainstorms on different subjects shows up. My muse is an evil bitch in that regard.